Please, just sit where you're told!

How the host wants to handle the following situation:

Customer: Hello, for two please.
Host: Sure right this way.

(Host leads customers to a table in a somewhat empty section where a server will be able to focus their full attention on them.)

Customer (pointing towards a much busier section): Um, excuse can I sit over there next to that fig tree?
Host: Okay, seriously I am just trying to do my job! Why can’t you just sit down!?!?

(The host’s face is beat red now and beginning to bubble at the surface like the interior of a pomegranate because this is the zillionth customer who has now chosen their own seat. Yelling, out of frustration, with flailing arms the host continues…)

If you really want to sit next to your precious fig tree, which by the way has bugs crawling in the dirt, that’s fine by me. Our server will be with you in about 10 minutes, now that you are the fourth customer to request a seat in this area of the restaurant within the past minute and a half. And if you want to wait an extra 10 minutes to have your order taken, again because your server is busy trying to manage four brand new tables all at once, that is fine by me. And if later you want your bill right away, fine, but keep in mind your server won’t have that bill out to you right away because their whole section also wants their bill right now too! And when you leave, I had better not here a peep out of you complaining about how slow your service was and how you should have sat in the other corner…the corner I suggested in the first place!

(The host huffs, pivots, and storms away.)

(In a perfect world the customer would have then said: "Gee, I’m so sorry, you’re absolutely right. Why don’t you lead the way?")

How the host will handle the situation:

Customer: Hello, for two please.
Host: Sure right this way.

(Host leads customers to a table in a somewhat empty section where a server will be able to focus their full attention on them.)

Customer (pointing towards a much busier section): Um, excuse can I sit over there next to that fig tree?
Host: Why of course, it is no problem at all!

(The host walks back to their stand thinking to themselves “Why am I even here? I could be at that party by now.”)

*Note: this is not to say that servers cannot handle a busy pace. My intentions for this blog are to point out how often this happens and what a nuisance it can become. If you sit where you are directed you will likely get much faster and friendlier service.